Is Premarital Sex a Sin? Navigating Faith & Relationships

[00:00:00] And one of the things that the Holy Spirit showed me was this, we have a huge ocean, right?

[00:00:05] What if the ocean didn't have boundaries?

[00:00:09] What happens when the ocean exceeds the boundaries that's set for it?

[00:00:14] We have what's called a tsunami.

[00:00:16] We have what's called a flood or a storm, right?

[00:00:21] And so God setting boundaries was not to limit your fun, but it was also to protect you.

[00:00:30] The scripture says that a person who sins sexually sins against his own body.

[00:00:37] Oh my gosh.

[00:00:38] That's interesting, right?

[00:00:39] It sure is.

[00:00:40] Because the first thing we think is, oh, I've sinned against God.

[00:00:42] And you have.

[00:00:43] But there are sins that self punish.

[00:00:47] Like what do you mean by that?

[00:00:48] That when you commit an adulterous act, you'll lose your wife, husband, you have threat of disease.

[00:00:56] There are things that will happen before you even deal with the wrath of God.

[00:01:01] They will self punish in the flesh.

[00:01:05] Yep, I got it.

[00:01:05] And so I think we have to understand that limiting those things is not just love for God, but it's love for yourself.

[00:01:13] Oh my goodness.

[00:01:14] It's self-love to limit who you share your spirit and soul with.

[00:01:20] It's a very physical, but very spiritual act.

[00:01:29] Well, welcome everybody.

[00:01:30] This is our inaugural show.

[00:01:33] We are so excited.

[00:01:35] The name of this show is God Class Podcast.

[00:01:39] And you see me looking down.

[00:01:41] It's because it's hard to get that mix up.

[00:01:44] Say that fast three times.

[00:01:45] Say that fast three times, right?

[00:01:47] So this is our inaugural show.

[00:01:49] My name is Roy Resto, and this is Marcus Martin.

[00:01:53] Since this is our inaugural show, Marcus, do you mind sharing with us what's the purpose of our podcast?

[00:01:59] Absolutely.

[00:02:00] The purpose of the podcast is to—I feel like this.

[00:02:03] The church does a great job at addressing certain issues, but undressing the issues is what we need.

[00:02:10] The word revelation in the Bible talks about revealing something or making it plain, right?

[00:02:14] I think that oftentimes we add so many nuances to things, and we really don't make it clear.

[00:02:20] You go to church, you get somewhat of an understanding of what's being said, but not really a clear understanding that you can go forth with because they don't take the time really to just, you know, dig into those topics.

[00:02:32] And so our goal is to go after the topics that a lot of times get glazed over at church, maybe because they're uncomfortable to speak about.

[00:02:42] Oh, he's going to talk about that?

[00:02:43] Right.

[00:02:44] So that's our goal.

[00:02:45] Our goal is to talk about those topics and to try to get those people that might have their foot on the edge of either walking away from God or the foot on the edge of walking towards God to kind of give them a subtle nudge into the kingdom of heaven.

[00:03:00] So that's the goal.

[00:03:01] Excellent.

[00:03:02] Excellent.

[00:03:02] Thank you.

[00:03:03] So with that said, what's going to be our first topic for today?

[00:03:05] The first topic is going to be, is sex before marriage a sin?

[00:03:14] Oh, you're going to talk about that?

[00:03:16] Yeah.

[00:03:16] Most people, when you hear that subject, especially believers and Christians, they know that they know that they know that it's a sin.

[00:03:23] And there's no question about that.

[00:03:25] The thing is, is that when you're talking to others that might not believe the same way you believe, it requires a bit of explanation.

[00:03:35] We're horrible at just saying, hey, do what I said.

[00:03:38] Like my mom used to tell us when we were kids, because I said so.

[00:03:42] And I think that doesn't really fly with this generation.

[00:03:45] This generation is like, I can read.

[00:03:48] And that doesn't make sense.

[00:03:50] Right.

[00:03:51] And so I think that's our goal now is to kind of clarify those things and talk about sex in a way that you get an understanding of why God and why the Bible states where the states.

[00:04:01] Wow.

[00:04:02] So that's definitely a hot topic for today.

[00:04:05] Definitely.

[00:04:05] Let me just back up a little bit, you know, a common practice today among people, and this is of all ages, as I've observed, is people are not getting married, but they live together.

[00:04:19] Yeah.

[00:04:20] And then later on, they get married.

[00:04:21] Yeah.

[00:04:22] So with that, I think that we could still apply the things we're going to talk about before you move in with that person.

[00:04:31] Are you going to have sex before that commitment is made?

[00:04:36] Yeah.

[00:04:36] Right?

[00:04:37] Yeah.

[00:04:37] And I think growing up, you know, especially around the friend groups that I used to hang around, it was a notion of testing out the waters.

[00:04:45] Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free?

[00:04:48] Oh, no.

[00:04:49] Yeah.

[00:04:50] So you just move in.

[00:04:51] No, I'm joking.

[00:04:52] That was a dad joke.

[00:04:54] Anyway.

[00:04:55] So, but that's kind of been the concept.

[00:04:58] It's kind of been, why would a person marry if they already have from that person what for most people is the end goal?

[00:05:08] And I think the sex is given so much value, but what people don't, I've been married for 21 years now, and I'm here to tell you that after 21 years, sex is not the only thing that's going to keep you married.

[00:05:23] I couldn't agree with you more.

[00:05:24] And you know, when you look at all the studies about why people divorce, it's the top three, okay?

[00:05:33] Guess what?

[00:05:34] Sex ain't, sex is not part of that.

[00:05:36] What?

[00:05:37] That's shocking to me.

[00:05:39] Yeah.

[00:05:39] Because that's what you hear most people complain about.

[00:05:42] Yeah.

[00:05:42] And that might be privately, right?

[00:05:44] Right.

[00:05:45] Yeah, true.

[00:05:45] It might be privately, but definitely what's going to get people divorced, finances, okay?

[00:05:53] Adultery, you know, abuse problems, you know, things like that.

[00:05:58] Not sex.

[00:05:59] Yeah.

[00:05:59] Not sex.

[00:06:00] So earlier you mentioned that there was some scriptural basis for, you know, what position

[00:06:07] you take on the topic.

[00:06:09] Can you share a little bit about that, Marcus?

[00:06:11] Sure.

[00:06:11] And by the way, Marcus, I struggle with trying to call him Marcus instead of Pastor Marcus.

[00:06:17] Yeah, yeah.

[00:06:18] Marcus is a preaching machine.

[00:06:20] Let me tell you that.

[00:06:21] If you ever seen him preach out there, he could preach for hours and he would have your attention

[00:06:25] the whole time.

[00:06:26] Thank you, sir.

[00:06:27] So sometimes I call him Pastor Marcus and I've heard him speak many times publicly, okay?

[00:06:32] So if I defer to him and want him to put his position as an ordained pastor there on certain

[00:06:39] biblical topics, it's on purpose.

[00:06:41] So can you go ahead and share that with us?

[00:06:44] Sure.

[00:06:44] So I think one of the first things to understand is covenant, right?

[00:06:49] Hebrews 9 and 22 says, and almost all things are by the law purged with blood and without

[00:06:56] shedding of blood, there is no remission of sin.

[00:06:59] And you probably say, what does that have to do?

[00:07:02] What does that have to do?

[00:07:03] Exactly.

[00:07:03] When a woman who is a virgin has sex, there is what's called a hymen.

[00:07:10] And the hymen is broken through sexual intercourse and it remits blood.

[00:07:17] So anytime there is a covenant, our covenant with Christ, Christ died for our sins, he had

[00:07:23] to shed his blood.

[00:07:24] So in order for you to make a covenant, the covenant comes through shedding of blood.

[00:07:32] Even when studies show, even when the person is already not a virgin, there is a low level

[00:07:40] amount of blood that is released during intercourse, right?

[00:07:45] So intercourse in and of itself is a covenant.

[00:07:49] Wow.

[00:07:50] Interesting, right?

[00:07:51] It is.

[00:07:51] It really is.

[00:07:53] So I like that.

[00:07:54] I like that.

[00:07:55] You know, Marcus, you mentioned some scriptural basis there.

[00:07:59] I'd like to talk briefly about the practicality of this stuff, okay?

[00:08:06] So obviously, if you're listening to us, you've probably already concluded that we're going

[00:08:11] to recommend no sex before marriage, right?

[00:08:15] And Marcus says, he just started sharing some of the scriptural basis for that.

[00:08:20] But let's just talk from a practicality point of view.

[00:08:23] Absolutely.

[00:08:24] And I need to, I need a little bit of room to develop the idea.

[00:08:28] Go for it.

[00:08:29] Okay?

[00:08:29] So here's the idea, okay, from a practicality point of view.

[00:08:33] Now, first of all, Marcus said that when you have sex, that you become one flesh.

[00:08:38] That's right.

[00:08:39] You are one flesh, okay?

[00:08:41] Now, when you first meet a person and you start dating, by the way, when young people

[00:08:48] are dating today, do they still call it dating or are they going?

[00:08:50] I remember when I was growing up, they said going out.

[00:08:53] They used to say, we go together.

[00:08:55] We're going together?

[00:08:56] We go together.

[00:08:57] Okay.

[00:08:57] Now, okay.

[00:08:58] So whenever you're going together with somebody, right?

[00:09:01] A little bit of formality for that.

[00:09:03] But the fact that you're even doing that implies you're checking out that person, right?

[00:09:08] You know, and at that moment, you should be concentrating on the aspects of the other

[00:09:16] person's personality that's going to contribute to a long time relationship.

[00:09:22] Absolutely.

[00:09:22] Okay?

[00:09:23] And guess what?

[00:09:24] It's not going to be sex.

[00:09:26] Mm-hmm.

[00:09:27] Pregnant pause on purpose, okay?

[00:09:29] Now, what do I mean by that, okay?

[00:09:31] If you have no sex before marriage and then you get married and you can start engaging in

[00:09:36] sex, right?

[00:09:37] I guarantee you, you're talking to each other.

[00:09:41] Honey, I like this.

[00:09:42] I don't like that.

[00:09:43] Mm-hmm.

[00:09:43] Oh, let's do more of this.

[00:09:45] We haven't tried this.

[00:09:46] Let's try that.

[00:09:47] Sex is always going to work itself out to the degree of talking to each other.

[00:09:52] Body language, right?

[00:09:53] Literally, right?

[00:09:54] Yeah.

[00:09:55] Body language, right?

[00:09:56] So that's the reason why you don't hear about sex being in the top three of why people divorce.

[00:10:03] Okay?

[00:10:03] You don't hear about that because by and large, you're going to work it out with your

[00:10:08] mate.

[00:10:09] Yeah, absolutely.

[00:10:09] Okay?

[00:10:10] So when you're dating, when you're going out, when you're, what was the term you just used?

[00:10:14] Go together.

[00:10:15] Going together.

[00:10:16] When you're going together, we need to put aside sex, the thought of that.

[00:10:23] Well, maybe not the thought of it, but we need to put that aside and say, what are those

[00:10:29] aspects of that person, this person has that habit.

[00:10:32] I cannot live with that habit.

[00:10:33] Mm-hmm.

[00:10:34] You better find that out quick.

[00:10:36] Absolutely.

[00:10:36] You know, this person has these political views.

[00:10:39] I cannot tolerate that or you can, whatever.

[00:10:41] Uh-huh.

[00:10:42] Okay?

[00:10:42] These, the parents, the family, you know, when you get married, you're marrying into somebody

[00:10:48] else's family.

[00:10:48] Absolutely.

[00:10:49] Is that going to be a level of compatibility?

[00:10:52] Who's going to handle the finances?

[00:10:54] What kind of personality do you have?

[00:10:56] Have you had your first fight yet?

[00:10:58] When I say fight, your first verbal with the person, you better have that.

[00:11:03] Okay?

[00:11:03] Because that's when you see the other person's personality really comes out.

[00:11:07] They're upset.

[00:11:07] You know, and if they're, if they're threatening you with bodily harm, out the door you go.

[00:11:12] Okay?

[00:11:13] So you should be exploring all that.

[00:11:16] Okay?

[00:11:17] However, if you let the minute, now this is before you're married, the minute you let sex

[00:11:23] come into it, all right?

[00:11:25] You become one flesh.

[00:11:28] Everything else that you should have been exploring.

[00:11:31] And those are the real items that are contribute to a long-term relationship.

[00:11:36] The sex overrides all of that stuff.

[00:11:39] Uh-huh.

[00:11:39] Okay?

[00:11:40] And now you're going to get into a marriage with a person.

[00:11:45] Okay?

[00:11:45] Because you thought you were good in bed.

[00:11:47] Uh-huh.

[00:11:47] Or you worked those things out.

[00:11:49] And later on, you found out, wow, I'm really not compatible with this person.

[00:11:54] Well, you should have been exploring those things before you had the sex that clouded your perspective.

[00:12:00] It does.

[00:12:00] Okay?

[00:12:01] So from that point of view, I'm strongly recommending you need to not have sex from a practical point of view before you get married,

[00:12:10] just to check out the sincerity of that other person.

[00:12:13] Yeah, absolutely.

[00:12:14] I agree.

[00:12:15] But let's look at some other thoughts, right?

[00:12:18] So what if there's a person who says, maybe before we got together, because this is typically what happens in relationship,

[00:12:26] before they get together, sex is frequent.

[00:12:29] And then after they get together, it tends to be where it's like, oh, I got you now.

[00:12:34] And it slows down.

[00:12:36] And so I think this is why a lot of people in the secular side, and even some Christians,

[00:12:42] don't doubt that some Christians are doing it too,

[00:12:45] will start a sexual relationship with the thought of, now I know what I'm getting.

[00:12:50] Now I know what the frequency will be.

[00:12:52] Now I know exactly what is going to be in marriage.

[00:12:57] What do you think about that?

[00:12:58] I don't know if I buy that.

[00:13:00] Yeah.

[00:13:01] I think people might be using that as a convenient excuse to engage a behavior that they know is not right.

[00:13:06] Simply said.

[00:13:07] Yeah.

[00:13:07] Now, that's my opinion.

[00:13:09] Okay?

[00:13:09] So it's interesting how people rationalize their behaviors.

[00:13:13] Okay?

[00:13:13] So be careful that you don't use certain arguments to rationalize bad behavior.

[00:13:19] You're saying, well, a mafioso.

[00:13:21] He said, well, I killed him.

[00:13:23] I whacked him.

[00:13:24] But he deserved it.

[00:13:25] Yeah.

[00:13:26] You know?

[00:13:26] He's not a good guy.

[00:13:27] He's not a good guy.

[00:13:28] But a bing, but a boom.

[00:13:29] Yeah.

[00:13:30] Okay?

[00:13:30] Yeah.

[00:13:30] So people rationalize very bad behaviors.

[00:13:33] And be careful that you don't rationalize that.

[00:13:36] Believe me, whether you're a virgin or not, okay,

[00:13:39] you are always going to work out the sexual likes with that person, the frequency.

[00:13:45] Okay?

[00:13:46] You know, just being from personal experience, you mentioned frequency of sex, right?

[00:13:51] Mm-hmm.

[00:13:51] It has nothing to do with how often you want it.

[00:13:53] It has to do with the practicality of it.

[00:13:55] When you have kids, if the kids are around, guess what?

[00:13:58] Mm-hmm.

[00:13:59] You're not going to have it as frequently as you want.

[00:14:01] You know what I'm saying?

[00:14:01] If you're a busy person, you both have career tracks.

[00:14:06] You know, you both have jobs, right?

[00:14:08] Oh, guess what?

[00:14:09] You're not going to get it as much as you want, you know?

[00:14:11] So I think the frequency is going to be demanded by the circumstances and not by the desires.

[00:14:17] And all the things that you like or you don't dislike that you're scared of, you know,

[00:14:21] you're looking at this woman or you're looking at this man and you're saying,

[00:14:24] I think I'm sexually attracted to them.

[00:14:26] I wonder if we'd be good in bed.

[00:14:28] And whether that's a basis for getting married, that cannot be the sole determining factor.

[00:14:34] Believe me, after you get married and you start having sex, those things will work out.

[00:14:41] They will.

[00:14:42] You'll talk to each other.

[00:14:43] You're not even getting married unless you already have a basis for communication, right?

[00:14:47] You're able to talk to each other.

[00:14:48] And believe me, when you're in bed, you're going to talk to each other.

[00:14:51] Honey, I really like that.

[00:14:52] Yeah.

[00:14:53] You know, just like the things we've been saying, so.

[00:14:55] I kind of have to disagree.

[00:14:57] I disagree in the sense of the Bible talks clearly about frequency.

[00:15:01] The Bible talks about if you go into a fast that you are to do it with the permission of your mate.

[00:15:07] Oh, because you're not having it.

[00:15:08] Mm-hmm.

[00:15:08] Because you're not going to have sex during a fast.

[00:15:10] Then he says, and then come together quickly.

[00:15:14] Use the word quickly to avoid temptation.

[00:15:17] That would be me.

[00:15:18] Yeah.

[00:15:18] And this is with permission.

[00:15:19] Right.

[00:15:19] And so this kind of tells you the power of the drive.

[00:15:23] This kind of tells you the power of the sex drive.

[00:15:26] And that God so respects your desire and your need for it, right?

[00:15:33] So I think when it comes to marriage relationships is that the frequency that your mate desires, you have to make it happen.

[00:15:42] You have to.

[00:15:43] There are so many different ways to go about it.

[00:15:46] Come home and lunch.

[00:15:47] Get in the closet.

[00:15:48] You have to make it happen.

[00:15:50] You have to make it happen because you're leaving.

[00:15:53] The Bible tells you to get married, at least you burn with desire.

[00:15:56] Getting saved or prayer does not keep you from wanting sex.

[00:16:01] Being in the worship team, playing the drums does not keep you from wanting sex.

[00:16:06] It is a desire.

[00:16:08] This is why you see so many pitfalls in leadership and the church leadership is because people stop taking care of God's business and stop taking care of their own business.

[00:16:18] This is where you see in the churches where they found bones in the Vatican and craziness like that because they were hiding sexual encounters with nuns.

[00:16:28] Did I go too far?

[00:16:30] Because a lot of times people don't understand that you cannot turn off what you're created to do.

[00:16:38] You can't turn it off.

[00:16:40] This is why God used regulations to regulate it because he knew that sex would happen.

[00:16:47] The scriptures talks about there are some, we would call them a monk or we would call them a person who just made to not, they don't have a sexual desire.

[00:16:57] Enoch's don't have a sexual desire.

[00:16:59] There are some like that, but most people don't have that gift.

[00:17:03] And so it's important that before, like you said, before getting into a marriage relationship that you know this stuff ahead of time.

[00:17:12] Now, the interesting thing is this, the Bible depicts marriage as sexual intercourse.

[00:17:20] So how then is it possible to have premarital sex if the Bible declares that sex is the consummation of marriage?

[00:17:32] I'm going to read something to you.

[00:17:34] Deuteronomy 22 and 13.

[00:17:36] I'm going to go through to 19.

[00:17:37] He said, if a man take a wife and go in unto her and hate her and give occasion of speech against her and bring up an evil name upon her and say,

[00:17:47] I took this woman and when I came to her, I found her not a maid or a virgin.

[00:17:52] Then shall the father of the damsel and her mother take and bring forth the token of the damsel's virginity unto the elders of the city in the gate.

[00:18:02] I'm going to stop there.

[00:18:02] The token of the damsel's virginity was a sheet with the blood of her hymen on it.

[00:18:12] So that's the token.

[00:18:14] That was the token of her virginity.

[00:18:17] So if there was no blood remitted, they knew that this woman wasn't a virgin.

[00:18:23] So in that generation, a woman's value was based upon the number of bodies she had or did not have.

[00:18:34] I think it might be the same today.

[00:18:36] We're not going to go into that in dating.

[00:18:39] But I think it might be the same today.

[00:18:41] But it can be a little misconstrued because it seems like men feel like they can get away with being trollops.

[00:18:46] And then women, you know, we can't take it if she's been with two guys.

[00:18:51] You know, we don't want to hear about it.

[00:18:53] You know.

[00:18:54] Too much information.

[00:18:55] TMI.

[00:18:55] Do people still use TMI out there to too much information?

[00:18:58] They do.

[00:18:58] Okay.

[00:18:59] So I can say that.

[00:19:00] By the way, Marcus is younger than me, as you could tell.

[00:19:02] And so I always hang with Marcus.

[00:19:04] I say, Marcus, what's the latest words, man?

[00:19:06] Am I dressed right over here?

[00:19:07] Am I matching over here?

[00:19:09] Am I, you know, my shoes?

[00:19:10] I look at his shoes.

[00:19:11] What are you wearing, man?

[00:19:12] So I try to get the latest from him.

[00:19:15] So if I ask him, is TMI, you know, still being used?

[00:19:18] So that's good.

[00:19:19] By the way, Marcus said something earlier and he mentioned eunuchs.

[00:19:23] Okay.

[00:19:24] Or e-nuchs, however you want to pronounce that.

[00:19:26] Okay.

[00:19:27] It's probably what's the better word.

[00:19:27] The reason why they had no sexual desire is because they were castrated.

[00:19:31] They cut them off.

[00:19:32] They cut them off.

[00:19:33] In the case of a male, the penis and the testicles.

[00:19:36] And the reason why they did that, usually the king wanted somebody to watch over his harem.

[00:19:44] Oh.

[00:19:45] And that was a male.

[00:19:46] And the king said, I'm not going to have some other.

[00:19:49] Yeah.

[00:19:50] I don't want no hormone-driven dude taking care of my harem.

[00:19:55] Hey, you said you're not dipping in my coffee.

[00:19:57] That's right.

[00:19:58] Okay.

[00:19:59] That's good.

[00:19:59] That's interesting.

[00:20:00] That's interesting.

[00:20:01] Yeah.

[00:20:01] So that's very interesting.

[00:20:03] So, you know, you mentioned something else.

[00:20:05] If we were to arrive at the conclusion that it's not biblical or practical or logical to

[00:20:13] have sex before marriage, you mentioned it already several times.

[00:20:17] You and I are males.

[00:20:20] There's hormones pulsing through our body, right?

[00:20:23] Mm-hmm.

[00:20:23] And now you're dating, going out with somebody, right?

[00:20:27] Mm-hmm.

[00:20:27] You're dating them.

[00:20:28] And I got to tell you, you know, you look at your wife, right, or your future wife,

[00:20:33] and you're up there thinking, you know, and you got your hands around her and your hormones

[00:20:38] are working and what's that feeling inside of my pants?

[00:20:40] You know, you know I'm talking about it.

[00:20:42] We're totally.

[00:20:44] Absolutely.

[00:20:44] And so that's hard.

[00:20:46] Yeah.

[00:20:47] That's hard.

[00:20:47] Literally.

[00:20:48] Literally.

[00:20:49] Oh, yep.

[00:20:51] Literally there, right?

[00:20:52] We went there.

[00:20:53] Okay.

[00:20:54] Boys and girls.

[00:20:55] Edit that out.

[00:20:56] Edit that out.

[00:20:56] No, no.

[00:20:57] Don't leave it in.

[00:20:58] Yep.

[00:20:58] That's good.

[00:20:59] No, so it's not as simple as saying, oh, don't have it, and it's done.

[00:21:04] It's not like that.

[00:21:05] It takes some wisdom.

[00:21:06] I had a good friend of mine that's a little older say to me, if you can't get rid of the

[00:21:11] desire, get rid of the opportunity.

[00:21:14] Oh, I love that.

[00:21:15] If you can't get rid of the opportunity, then try to get rid of the desire.

[00:21:18] I love that.

[00:21:19] It takes wisdom.

[00:21:21] It takes wisdom.

[00:21:22] You can't.

[00:21:23] The scripture says, tell the man, hold fire in his bosom and not be burned.

[00:21:26] You're going to be around this woman.

[00:21:28] You're going to be at her house.

[00:21:29] I'm talking about you're going to Netflix and chill.

[00:21:32] What do you think is going to happen?

[00:21:34] Because it's natural for you to have that desire.

[00:21:37] It's natural for a man when he's in the room with a woman to have that desire.

[00:21:41] It's weird to me, though.

[00:21:43] I feel like maybe I'm wrong, and maybe it's been my encounter.

[00:21:46] Don't you feel like women can handle that better?

[00:21:48] You ever thought that?

[00:21:49] I've not thought about it, but it seems like the guy is the one that's going to be the aggressor.

[00:21:55] Aggressive, yeah.

[00:21:56] In that situation, right?

[00:21:58] Maybe God made it that way.

[00:22:00] Maybe God created it that way, because I just always thought about that.

[00:22:04] I'm like, it seemed like I've been married for 21 years, and it seems like my wife can wait.

[00:22:09] 90% of the time, I'm the aggressive.

[00:22:12] Sometimes it's like a surprise.

[00:22:14] I'm like, oh, okay.

[00:22:16] But most of the time, it's me, and I always thought about that.

[00:22:19] I'm like, I wonder if that's the way God created it.

[00:22:23] What's the hormones?

[00:22:24] It's the propagation of the species.

[00:22:26] We're breeders.

[00:22:27] I mean, if you put it down in very cold terms, okay, we're breeders, and God put that in us, right?

[00:22:35] And so I agree with that.

[00:22:36] I like the word discipline, because in my life, I've had trouble with that.

[00:22:41] And so I've always made that a goal of mine, to be disciplined.

[00:22:44] Because there's been, and probably on other episodes, we'll both share those times when there was a lack of discipline,

[00:22:51] that things got out of control that the Lord delivered us from.

[00:22:54] Nonetheless, if you decide on this course, it requires certainly a level of discipline.

[00:23:02] And I wanted to expand just a little bit on what you said about the opportunity, okay?

[00:23:08] If you, even if you say, I am not going to do this, okay, and you decide upon that course of action, don't find yourself in a hotel room.

[00:23:18] Right.

[00:23:19] Okay?

[00:23:20] If you get invited over to somebody's house, and there's nobody in there, and there's the bedroom, door wide open,

[00:23:28] and you can do whatever you want to for the first time, don't let those things, if you think you can be tempted by that,

[00:23:36] you need to move out saying, well, whenever I'm with my mate, my potential mate that I'm going to get married with,

[00:23:42] be in a public setting, be around family, have a chaperone.

[00:23:45] I hate to say chaperone.

[00:23:46] People don't use that anymore.

[00:23:48] But, you know, just be around there that you'll say, man, I won't fall into that temptation.

[00:23:53] You know, the biggest problem with people that are being delivered from drugs, okay?

[00:24:00] The biggest number one reason for recidivism, okay, is that somebody will be in a drug program.

[00:24:09] They get delivered from drugs, right?

[00:24:12] Totally delivered.

[00:24:13] Guess what?

[00:24:13] They go back to what you just said.

[00:24:15] They go back to the same environment.

[00:24:17] Now their friends are out there attempting them, and they get right back into it.

[00:24:21] And so it's like you said, and like I intimated there, that we've got to not allow ourselves to be put into that situation.

[00:24:29] Let me go back to something you just said.

[00:24:31] You said that men are breeders.

[00:24:33] There is a school of thought, right?

[00:24:36] And that because men have all of this seed, right?

[00:24:41] So a woman can only get pregnant one time, right?

[00:24:44] One at a time.

[00:24:45] Right.

[00:24:46] But a man can go and impregnate how many women he want.

[00:24:49] I never thought about that.

[00:24:50] Right.

[00:24:50] Right.

[00:24:51] Yeah.

[00:24:51] So the school of thought is this, is that because that is the case, maybe that's the reason that men should be able to have multiple wives.

[00:25:01] What do you think about that?

[00:25:02] Definitely not.

[00:25:04] Okay.

[00:25:05] So once again, I think there are some, I think there's a couple of religions even based here in the United States and in the Middle East that believe multiple wives is acceptable.

[00:25:14] Ask any wife whether that's acceptable.

[00:25:17] If you live through it.

[00:25:18] If you live through it.

[00:25:19] Right.

[00:25:20] After you recover from your wounds.

[00:25:23] Yeah.

[00:25:23] No, that's interesting.

[00:25:25] So I would think that's a position that somebody is looking to rationalize a bad behavior.

[00:25:31] I agree.

[00:25:32] Yeah.

[00:25:33] Yeah.

[00:25:33] So we've gone over some scriptures over here.

[00:25:36] We've gone over the practicalities, the challenges of this.

[00:25:40] I'd like to just give some closing thoughts on the topic over here.

[00:25:46] So Marcus, what's some closing topics or what comes to mind here on this?

[00:25:53] Firstly, the fact that the scripture calls premarital sex fornication.

[00:25:58] Ooh.

[00:25:59] It calls it a sin.

[00:26:00] It is.

[00:26:01] I struggled with that when I was younger because I said, Lord, why would you give me a desire and then regulate what I do with it?

[00:26:10] Right.

[00:26:11] And one of the things that the Holy Spirit showed me was this.

[00:26:14] We have a huge ocean, right?

[00:26:17] What if the ocean didn't have boundaries?

[00:26:20] What happens when the ocean exceeds the boundaries that's set for it?

[00:26:25] We have what's called a tsunami.

[00:26:28] We have what's called a flood or a storm, right?

[00:26:32] And so God setting boundaries was not to limit your fun, but it was also to protect you.

[00:26:41] The scripture says that a person who sins sexually sins against his own body.

[00:26:48] Oh, my gosh.

[00:26:49] That's interesting, right?

[00:26:50] It sure is.

[00:26:51] Because the first thing we think is, oh, I've sinned against God.

[00:26:53] And you have.

[00:26:54] But there are sins that self-punish.

[00:26:58] Like, what do you mean by that?

[00:26:59] That when you commit an adulterous act, you'll lose your wife, husband, you have threat of disease.

[00:27:07] There are things that will happen before you even deal with the wrath of God.

[00:27:13] They will self-punish in the flesh.

[00:27:16] I got it.

[00:27:16] And so I think we have to understand that limiting those things is not just love for God, but it's love for yourself.

[00:27:24] Oh, my goodness.

[00:27:25] It's self-love to limit who you share your spirit and soul with.

[00:27:31] It's a very physical but very spiritual act.

[00:27:35] I've heard teachings of soul ties.

[00:27:39] And we won't go into that because, you know, people get so deep into, you know, once you have sex with someone, your soul is tied to them forever.

[00:27:46] That would be a whole other subject to get into.

[00:27:49] But I don't disagree with it.

[00:27:51] But it would be a whole different subject to get into.

[00:27:53] But it had us when I was a kid.

[00:27:56] I grew up, like, in a church where it was like a prophetic church, and it was a very devil conscious, right?

[00:28:04] And so sex took a whole new meaning, like, whatever demons and lambs gonna get in you.

[00:28:11] And it just got to be where it was like, even when I was a kid and I was doing things that I probably shouldn't have done,

[00:28:18] I would literally pray and say, Lord, don't let this girl's demon.

[00:28:21] And I'm not even thinking about the fact, the fact that there's some physical stuff or some physical danger that could come to me.

[00:28:30] So in hindsight, I wish I had done something differently.

[00:28:33] But I know that everything that God says in his word concerning sex is for me and not to me.

[00:28:41] I love that.

[00:28:42] I love, you know, thanks for putting that that way.

[00:28:45] Because I don't feel threatened by that, you know, as a believer.

[00:28:48] You know, by the way, all you guys watching, I like it when Pastor Marcus talks,

[00:28:52] because it gives me the opportunity to drink some of my premium coffee over here.

[00:28:57] He's a coffee guy.

[00:28:59] I'm a coffee drinker, and I only drink Arabica beans and, you know, some premium coffee.

[00:29:07] So that's what I define as premium coffee.

[00:29:09] I cut it off by 3 o'clock every day.

[00:29:12] And have you ever seen me without a coffee cup in my hand?

[00:29:15] And it's an alien abduction.

[00:29:16] I'm a clone.

[00:29:17] Something's wrong.

[00:29:18] That's not.

[00:29:18] Something's wrong.

[00:29:19] I want my man back.

[00:29:21] I want Roy back.

[00:29:23] Hey, so thank you, Marcus.

[00:29:25] You know, I'd like to just conclude with anybody out there that's currently thinking about dating somebody

[00:29:34] or you want to get into a relationship with somebody.

[00:29:36] If you're entertaining this behavior that Marcus and I have been talking about, which is no sex before marriage,

[00:29:44] you've got to talk that out.

[00:29:46] Sit down and tell each other, honey, I love you so much that I hereby commit that we're – I'm not going to have sex with you until after we get married.

[00:29:57] We're going to explore this relationship.

[00:29:59] I love you so much.

[00:30:01] Let's have all the fun in exploring each other's personalities without the encumbrance of sex.

[00:30:07] I love you that much.

[00:30:09] And let's both commit to that.

[00:30:12] When you both commit to it, that's like a contract, all right?

[00:30:17] I'm a business person, all right?

[00:30:19] Contract means a lot to me.

[00:30:21] When you say something verbally, that's a vow.

[00:30:25] That's a contract, okay?

[00:30:26] And by the way, in a court of law, a verbal vow is like an accepted contract, by the way.

[00:30:33] And so it's like putting on a ring, okay?

[00:30:36] You've made a commitment, all right?

[00:30:39] Now, commitment is something that a lot of people are scared of, all right?

[00:30:45] I don't blame them.

[00:30:46] And it's not age-related.

[00:30:47] People say, oh, the young people, they don't want to get committed.

[00:30:49] Committed, I'm saying, I know plenty of my age that don't want to commit to anything either, okay?

[00:30:54] But if you want to test the person's commitment, then the commitment to not have sex is a great test of a person's ability to carry through on a commitment.

[00:31:07] If they can't carry through on that commitment, will they carry through on the commitment for marriage?

[00:31:12] Absolutely.

[00:31:12] On the marriage vows?

[00:31:14] Absolutely.

[00:31:15] Okay?

[00:31:15] So I just want to leave it with that.

[00:31:17] Now I'm going to call you Pastor Marcus, which you're not a pastor right now, but I can't get it out of my lexicon.

[00:31:23] And I'm only saying that because I never want to end the show.

[00:31:27] We never want to end the show on God Class Podcast.

[00:31:31] I have trouble getting that out for some reason.

[00:31:33] That's why I haven't tried it yet.

[00:31:35] More coffee.

[00:31:36] Premium coffee.

[00:31:38] So Marcus, do you mind leading us in a prayer?

[00:31:41] Heavenly Father, we thank you for this podcast.

[00:31:45] We thank you for the viewers, the listeners.

[00:31:48] Yes.

[00:31:49] We pray that those that are listening that might have been on the edge of trying to figure out if they want to do this God thing, God, I pray that this was the final push they needed.

[00:31:59] The understanding of what you require of them was the final thing that they needed.

[00:32:05] And even those that are already believers but struggle with this area of their faith, I pray, Father, in the name of Jesus that you would help them, help them through it all in the name of Jesus.

[00:32:17] Now, if there's someone that's listening that is not a believer, that is not saved, I ask that you repeat after me.

[00:32:23] Say, Father, forgive me for all of my sins.

[00:32:28] I acknowledge that without you, I would not see heaven.

[00:32:35] But I thank you that because of your Son, Jesus Christ, all of my sins are forgiven.

[00:32:42] Yes.

[00:32:42] I accept you into my life, therefore I am saved.

[00:32:48] The Bible declares that the angels of heaven rejoice when just one soul accepts Jesus Christ.

[00:32:56] And so we thank you for listening.

[00:32:58] You be blessed.

[00:33:00] We are going to have a new topic coming up.

[00:33:02] So what's the new topic, Ron?

[00:33:03] Oh, man, it's a good one.

[00:33:05] Thank you for asking that.

[00:33:06] So you guys got to tune in to this next one.

[00:33:09] Is it okay for Christians to drink?

[00:33:11] Should we get crunk?

[00:33:15] Next time.

[00:33:16] Next time.

[00:33:17] See you.

[00:33:18] Take care, everybody.

[00:33:19] Bye-bye.

[00:33:20] Let your kingdom come.

[00:33:21] Let your will be done.

[00:33:22] Yeah.

[00:33:23] Let your kingdom come.

[00:33:24] Let your will be done.

[00:33:25] Let your kingdom come.

[00:33:27] Let your will be done.